I’ll admit, there was way too much laser fighting, way too many parachutes, and way too much
Starscream Frank Welker Chris Latta.
The first war between G.I. Joe and Cobra (1985-86), as documented in the G.I. Joe animated series, was the most violent conflict in history never to result in a single casualty. Through a combination of terrible aim, superhuman jumping ability, and impossibly reliable parachutes, every combatant escaped even the most dire of situations without so much as the angle of his beret askew. The G.I Joe series is an ode to the improbable escape, and the thrill of the violence comes not from the possibility of death but from the zany ways the Joes and Cobras avoid it. (Will the live-action G.I. Joe film due later this summer stick to the cartoon’s bloodless ways? Not likely.) Herewith, a collection of the most ridiculous escapes in G.I. Joe history.