Courtesy of Rick Mercer from "This Hour Has 22 Minutes" on CBC Television:
On behalf of Canadians everywhere I'd like to offer an apology to the United States of America. We haven't been getting along very well recently and for that I am truly sorry...
The Pacific Northwest tree octopus (Octopus paxarbolis) can be found in the temperate rainforests of the Olympic Peninsula on the west coast of North America. Their habitat lies on the Eastern side of the Olympic mountain range, adjacent to Hood Canal. These solitary cephalopods reach an average size (measured from arm-tip to mantle-tip,) of 30-33 cm. Unlike most other cephalopods, tree octopi are amphibious, spending only their early life and the period of their mating season in their ancestrial [sic] aquatic environment. Because of the moistness of the rainforests and specialized skin adaptations, they are able to keep from becoming desiccated for prolonged periods of time, but given the chance they would prefer resting in pooled water.
![[Tree Octopus]](http://www.zuckervati.com/archives/images/treeocto.jpg)
From The Onion (http://www.theonion.com)
WASHINGTON, DC.President Bush expressed frustration and anger Monday over a U.N. report stating that Iraqi president Saddam Hussein is now fully complying with weapons inspections. "Enough is enough," a determined Bush told reporters. "We are not fooled by Saddam's devious attempts to sway world opinion by doing everything the U.N. asked him to do. We will not be intimidated into backing down and, if we have any say in the matter, neither will Saddam." Bush added that any further Iraqi attempt to meet the demands of the U.N. or U.S. will be regarded as "an act of war."
Once upon a time we invented a great game called "Escape From Eluned". In truth you've probably played it yourself under a different name.
The rules are as follows:
1) Get a friend very drunk - one called Eluned works best.
2) Balance as many things as you can on them without waking them up.
3) Take photographic evidence.
4) Remove all the items, thus leaving the victim unaware that anything has happened.
5) Create a website. Sit back and watch friend turn red.
This is freaking hilarious, ya gotta love the British sense of humour. Not too many people could make sexual diseases into an X-mas song.
Would you like to play with Mister Rogers boys and girls? I know he wants to play with you!
What cruel monster would come up with this idea? And just how do they pitch it to investors?
![[why_dogs_kill_their_owners.jpg]](http://www.zuckervati.com/archives/images/small_why_dogs_kill_their_owners.jpg)
Something for those who want to horribly disfigure people who wear mullets.
Wonder if this should have been under “skeptic”. It’s a mystery that may never be solved. http://www.ebaumsworld.com/britneyboobs.html
(Posted for Kurt - have fun in Chicago)
